Being stood up

A friend of mine messaged me earlier with a [tongue-in-cheek] Code Red situation while on the way to a date: the girl he was going to meet had disappeared from Bumble (a dating app) 10 minutes before they were due to meet and as such he couldn’t remember her name because her profile had seemingly evaporated.

I didn’t get the message until a bit later because of timezones (read: I was having a lie in) but I messaged back to see how it was going, only to find out she hadn’t turned up at all. She’d just disappeared with no way to contact her.

How bloody rude.

I guess at least he didn’t have to worry about the whole forgetting-her-name scenario, but to not have the common decency to at least tell someone you don’t want to meet, knowing they would be heading out somewhere is just a dick move. I’m hoping the glass of wine he had while waiting was a good one.

Is this modern day dating? Dating apps giving a plethora of people to choose from, to coverse with, to meet, meaning that some just fall by the wayside; collateral damage? People are just profile names behind a screen, meaning that manners and consideration go out the window?

I’ve had a little foray into dating apps over the last few years of being single, but more in a meeting-new-people sense and for a Tinder social experiment, and in actual fact I’ve made some great friends out of it and met some fab people. But it can be pretty ruthless, and you have to have a bit of a thick skin as you can get picked up & dropped in the same time it takes you to change your pants.

But I’m not sure it’s just dating apps. Although I’ve never been stood up in the same way as my friend, I have been ghosted, ignored and dropped, and that’s when I’ve met people in actual real life situations.

I suspect times have changed about how people date; there’s often multiple people on the scene at the same time and you may or may not make the grade. But there’s no need for rudeness and a lack of basic common decency. We’re still all people at the end of the day, we still should treat all people (strangers or not) with respect and consideration. In short, don’t be a dick.

So to the girl who stood my friend up: you’re a dick.

To my friend: she’s not worth knowing anyway.

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