A year in people #59 – the definitely not a date guy

A few years ago after I got divorced there was a man (DC) who used to ask me out a lot. I kept saying no. I gave him credit for his persistence, but my answer was always no (just didn’t fancy him and I wasn’t interested in dating).

One night, we’d all been out somewhere and he said he’d give me a lift home. I said OK. He had a wry smile on his face and I jokingly told him that he better not try anything.

I remember being really tired and just wanting to go home. I’m sure I had a race or something the next day. I wasn’t drinking, but I hadn’t driven either.

“Can we stop by McDonalds on the way back? I just want to get some food.” He asked.

Ohmigod FFS I’m so tired. “I don’t suppose I have a choice do I? After all, you’re driving.” I replied wearily.

“HA! Not really.” He smiled. “Do you like my car?”

He had a flash car. I had been slightly into cars at one point in my life, when I was married to a car fanatic. That interest disappeared when I got divorced. “Meh. It’s a car. I don’t really care.” He looked offended. “I mean yes, DC, sure.”

“0-60 in [however-many-I-don’t-care] seconds, look.” He wheelspan off the roundabout and up the road.

Oh hooray! I’m in a car with a 17 year old boy, I thought as I rested my head against the window dreaming of my bed.

We sat in Tritton Road McDonalds in Lincoln at around midnight on a Friday or Saturday night, surrounded by either drunk students or 15 year old youths. I got McChicken nuggets. Or chicken McNuggets. Which way round is that anyway? I think he got a burger.

Surprisingly, despite the ambience of drunken shouting we actually had quite a good chat. Get him away from other people and his bravado dropped, he stopped acting like a 17 year old boy and was a bit more serious and stopped trying to ask me out. I can’t remember exactly what we talked about, but it wasn’t unpleasant. I still didn’t want to go out with him though.

A day or two after, I get a message from one of my friends. “How was your date with DC?”

“Eh?” I sent back.

“DC says you went on a date.”

FFS. Right. Of course he did.

Obviously we didn’t. Our mutual friends knew that we didn’t, and so it became a pisstake that DC took me to McDonalds on a date and regularly mentioned. After that he started to deny it, said he was never interested in me and unfriended me on Facebook some time after. The ultimate burn.



Published by Paps

I love running, writing, travel and adventure. I'll give anything a go once, and am always up for a laugh.

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